Mixed Metaphors V

Mixed Metaphors V

Mixed Metaphors V

Tony awoke to the growling sound of a Philadelphia Stealer’s lineman, who couldn’t wait to sack the Charger’s quarterback. He recalled the apartment becoming cold and helping Becky, from the floor to the bed. They were both under the covers naked, however Becky’s left foot was sticking out precariously into the cold room.

He sat up rubbing his eyes and face, in an attempt to locate the growling sound, discovering it was coming from his bed partner’s stomach. They had eaten lunch, however it was now twenty-five to nine and apparently she was hungry; and her stomach didn’t care who knew it. Tony laid his hand on her stomach and rubbed lightly.

“Baby … are you hungry?”


“Your stomach woke me. It keeps yelling, ‘feed me … feed me.’ Do you want to go out to get something to eat?”

“Yah …I guess I am hunger. Don’t you have anything here?”

“I don’t know. That would depend on Mrs. Stevenson. She is the housekeeper and orders the groceries.”

“Well what do you have in the fridge?”

“I don’t know. I have lived here for two years; however have only gone in the refrigerator for bottled water and an occasional soda. You want to take a look?”

Tony reluctantly crawled out of the warm bed, and was attacked by the artic wind of the apartment. He went into the bathroom and picked up two fresh robes. One he put on, the other was delivered to his new roommate.

“Here,” he said, “It’s cold out here.”

“Thank you kind sir,” said Becky as she pulled the robe under the covers, and struggled to put it on. When she had acclimated to the temperature she got out of bed and went into the bathroom, closing the door behind her. The apartment took on an eerie glow from the New York City lights and Tony went out into the front room and turned on the gas lighter to the fireplace. He added some wood then stood and watched mesmerized, as the new flames capturing his attention.

Mentally breaking away from his flaming captor, Tony turned on his stereo, and placed a disk of “Fattburger” on the CD player. A jazz instrumental rendition of “Oyo ye Como Va”, began to play.

He sat on the couch and began going through his notes and photos of the Italian shoot. There would have to be a lot of preparation due to the planning, implementation, and coordination of the details of the trip, however he knew his secretary would handle most of it.

He also knew Becky would love it, after all how bad could it be. It was the location where Sophia Loren built her house. His job was almost insignificant compared to the rest of the crew, but his was the last word and the partners depended on him to make the correct decisions.

Becky came into the room breaking his concentration. She asked,

“Baby what would you say to a toasted tuna sandwich and a glass of milk?”

“Where are you going to get it?”

“Well there is fresh milk in the fridge. All I need is Mayonnaise, chopped onions, bread, celery and a little pickle relish. Then all I have to do is mix all that up, toast the bread and spread the mixture on the toast. ‘Walla’, toasted tuna sandwiches. A nice cold glass of milk to go with it and we are gold.”

“You can do all of that?”

“Of course, all girls can. What do you do when you get hungry in the middle of the night?”

“I get out of bed, get dressed and grab a cab. Then I go to one of a thousand restaurants in New York that are open all night.”

“Well this will be almost the same,” she said laughing, “only you won’t have to get dressed or go out. Relax I’ll have everything ready in ten minutes or so.”

Tony again got caught up in the logistics of the trip, and lost track of everything else.

“OK ..,” she said, “Put all that stuff down, go wash your hands and join me in the kitchen.”

She said it with such authority that he almost jumped up. After washing his hands and face, Tony went into the kitchen. She was sitting at a table. There was food on two plates and milk in two large glasses.

“I have never eaten in here before. Are those potato chips?”

“Yes … Tony do you actually live here?”

He nodded his head as the creamy cold milk slid down his throat and came to rest in his stomach. A feeling he had not felt since he was a little boy. With one gulp of milk and a bite of Becky’s tuna sandwich, long forgotten memories of his childhood came rushing back, giving him a warm feeling. Tears were in his eyes as he ate her delectable repast.

“What’s wrong sweetie?”

“Feels like a wonderful dream Becky and I’m afraid I’m going to wake up to my old life. If I ever did, I think I would just end it all.”

She got up and went around the table. She then sat on his lap and began stroking his hair. She said,

“Put your hand under my robe and touch my titty. Does that feel like a dream?”

“Absolutely! A fantastically wonderful dream.”

“How about this my love?”

Becky lowered her mouth to his ear and bit his earlobe, a little harder than she had intended.


“Still a dream?” she asked.

“No you have convinced me. That hurt.”

“Now finish your sandwich and chips. Then we can go out and see what has your attention.”

Tony sat eating with one hand and rubbing his earlobe with the other. He wondered why he had never eaten here before. ‘Dummy,’ he said to himself, ‘You can’t cook.’

“Becky maybe we should hire a cook.”

“Why … what’s wrong with my sandwich?”

“Nothing baby. It is wonderful. I was just thinking how nice it is to eat here and not have to leave the apartment every time we are hungry.”

“I spent two years in college,” she said, “learning how to cook in my culinary classes at NYU. I received very good grades and am an excellent cook. Even my mother thinks so. Why would you want to hire a cook when you already have one?”

“You have a full time job, sweetie. You aren’t going to have time.”

“You don’t want a full time cook, honey, just someone who can put something together when you don’t want to go out, right?”


“Well I’m your girl.”

“For life?”

“Yes … baby,” she said, “for life. Tell me something; you have enough food to feed a family of four. If you never eat here what happens when the food goes bad?”

“Mrs. Stevenson always tells me if something is getting near its expiration date. I tell her to take it home. She has quite a large family.”

“Oh ok. I thought the food was being wasted.”

“Speaking of food, Ronnie the cab driver called me and said he would be waiting down stairs at eight-thirty. I asked him to get you a hot chocolate; is that ok?”

“That’s fine honey. Hey what’s that track playing on the stereo?”

“The group is called Fattburger… The track is called, ‘Everybody wants to rule the world.’ I have all their albums. They are really great aren’t they?”

“Yes … the epitome of smooth jazz. I just wish I could get my brother away from that “rap crap”.

“Its probably just a phase. When we go to Hawaii, I’ll set him up with a good CD player, some excellent earphones and a good amount of good CDs. Maybe we can break him of that noise. Extraordinary how potent cheap music is.”

“Did you just make that up … about the cheap music?”

“No … I wish. That is a quotation from the famous playwright, Noel Coward.”

“Cute. Well hopefully we can stop him before he goes deaf.”

Although they both felt it was no laughing matter, they both broke into laughter. When they finished eating Tony said,

“Now what are you going to do with the dirty dishes; throw them out?”

“No … I thought I would wash them. You really ought to rub up against the world honey. Living up here on the fortieth floor has taken you away from reality. You really should get back and find out how the world works.”

“You are my world. I just want to find out how you work. Speaking of work… when we go in tomorrow, will you put some sketches of some tattoos together for the band-aid layouts? Travis wants to propose a whole new line with the tattoos as the main section. He believes Johnson, will really like it.”

“Which Johnson? Ms. Johnson or Johnson and Johnson?”

“J and J. Don’t forget you will be working primarily for her, in her section, but I have your back. I’ll send he a memo on the tattoo drawings first thing. Also I need you to work on those spots for Hugo Boss. Don’t forget they have a new line of casual clothing now. So maybe two suits, and some casual clothes?

“I’ll make several drawings for you and you can choose what you want.”

“This is where politics come in. You go ahead and make the drawings, then turn them in to her. She will then look at them and pass them on to me.”

“I see what you mean. The minute I don’t include her in everything that I do, the crap will be hitting every wall.”

“You just learned a vital lesson in office politics.”

“You want to see where you will be spending next week?”

“Next week?”

“Yes. I have some photos of the Amalfi Coast. Here is a photo of Sophia Loren’s house. Fantastic view.”

“You never see anything like that in Red Hook.”

“Before you and I are done with this world, we will see it all.”

“… and have babies too?”

“Yes … babies too.”

“Do you have enough clothes to take on the trip?”

“Are you kidding me? I bought Saks out. Do you want the receipts?”

“No … just stick them in the top drawer of the desk, over there.”

“Don’t you even care how much I spent?”

“Nope! I told you to get some clothes and you did. That’s good enough for me.”

“But the money …”

“Sweetie … Listen to me. Money isn’t worth anything, if you have nothing to spend it on. We might as well use it to get the fire going. Don’t you understand?
I’m happy when you are happy. We have a symbiotic relationship.”

“A what?”

“Symbiosis … is a term used only when two or more organisms benefit from their relationship; like you and I. In most cases, the term symbiosis is used only if the association is obligatory and benefits both organisms. We kind of feed off each other.”

“I don’t know … it sounds kind of gross.”

“It is a good thing … trust me. Don’t forget about all of the people you helped by purchasing all those clothes.”

“Like who?”

“The salesgirl for one. Saks, the clothing manufactures, the people who deliver the clothes to Saks and the people who brought your packages here. The people who made the cloth and thread in the first place. The clothing designers; advertisers; not us as we don’t handle Saks … but …”

“OK you have convinced me. With money we are on the top of the food chain, so to speak, and when we spend some of it, it is beneficial to a lot of people.”

“Especially me.”

“Why you?” she asked with a giggle in her voice.

“Because it makes me feel wonderful to see you smile. I would die for your smile.”

“You don’t have too,” she said smiling, “Just love me.”

“An easy assignment.”

“So where is this Alpha Coast?”

“Amalfi Coast. A-mal-fi,” said Tony, smiling, “It’s about fifty or sixty miles south of Naples, not to far from the Mount Vesuvius volcano, which is east of Naples. That is the only volcano on the European mainland to have erupted within the last hundred years, although it is not currently erupting.”

“Is it safe to go there?”

“I believe so. We will be on the other side of a chain of mountains, along the south coast. Vesuvius is notorious for its destruction of Roman cities of Pompeii and Herculaneum in A.D. 79. It’s erupted many times since and is regarded as one of the most dangerous volcanoes in the world because of the population of 3,000,000 people now living close to it, and of course its tendency towards explosive eruptions.

The reason Pompeii was destroyed was the ash was caught on the south wind and covered the city. Had the wind been going the other way, it would have destroyed Naples instead. That would have been a tragedy. Naples is where pizza was invented.”

“You sure know a lot about everything.”

“Discovery Channel; Science Channel and the National Geographic Channel. No dates ever; remember?”

“All you ever watched is educational channels?”

“No … You should test me sometime on the ‘FRIENDS’ series or ‘FRASIER’, or even ‘CHEERS or ‘CSI’.”

“I get it you watch a lot of television. If you have never been on a date, how did you get to be such a fantastic lover?”

“I read … too.”

“OK … you had your gourmet tuna sandwich, chips and milk. How are you going to pay me?”

“I have some cash in my wallet.”

“Not interested. What else you got?”

“A wild desire to make love to you?”

“Perfect. You put that stuff away and I’ll clean the dishes, then we can go to bed.”

“Leave the dishes. Mrs. Stevenson complains she doesn’t have enough to do anyway.

Come with me and I’ll show you my notes on ‘How to Make Love’.”

“You don’t need notes. We can just play it by ear.”

“But my ear still hurts.”

“Come to bed … silly.”

“Yes mam, but I wanted another tuna sandwich.”

“Tony … Come to bed … now.”

“You won’t hurt me again … will you?”



They walked hand in hand into the bedroom. He lifted her up like she was a small pillow and gently put her on the bed. Opening the front of her robe, Tony placed his lips on her nipple and began to suck. She knew they were both ready as her pussy was very moist, and she could feel his erection pushing into her hip.

Slowly; agonizingly Tony moved from one breast to the other kissing, sucking and licking. Becky although enjoying his attention was having a difficult time waiting, wanting, needing like a tiny girl waiting for her ice cream after Sunday School. Patients she thought, he hasn’t left her hanging yet. She felt his mouth move between her titties, then downward across her bellybutton to her pussy mound. She wanted to push his head in an attempt to hurry him along. She was in need of a good hard orgasm or maybe two.

“Tony,“ she said, “Please honey … I need you … baby I want you.”

Tony moved down and placed his lips on her throbbing clitoris. When he began to suck, she sighed knowing the feeling she was waiting for would not be long coming. She thought it was a great feeling to have Tony behind her, fucking her doggie style with his arms around her squeezing her breasts, and it was very nice when he was facing her and she had her arms around him, but she wasn’t quite adapt at having her legs spread wide and his face sucking everything between her legs.

Once she was getting ready to cum, everything was good but it almost seemed silly when she could look down and see the top of his head and feel his wet lips licking and sucking her labia. But she was almost there, as she ran her fingers through his hair. The telltale signs were slowly moving into place. A slight pain in her back just above her butt.

The pain then became a kind of a tickle in her thighs building, increasing in intensity. She wanted to scream, when suddenly the sensation moved into her cunt and her stomach. It was extraordinary as it was always the same, but in some ways different each time, causing her to crave as much from him as he could deliver.

She saw she had her fingers in his hair holding him so he was unable to move away from her eager desire; her yearning pussy. It was coming and she felt compelled to tell him, but she was so close she could only hold on to him hoping he would make her cum. She no longer was bothered by anything, except her extreme need to release the cum in her system.

A small dribble allowed a little relief, then the flood gates opened and she began to gush her thick, sticky juice into his open mouth, her tears flowing freely as the afterglow, grabbed her and she relaxed. Tony got up on his knees, between her wide spread legs and lowered himself, shoving his rock hard cock into her leaking cunt. Oh … she thought there was nothing like this in the world. If done correctly, fucking was the most wonderful action there was.

There was nothing to say, as Tony was answering every wild desire before she could express it. Before she was aware that she wanted it faster, he doubled his efforts and fucked her even harder. When they were in this state she didn’t mind being treated like a whore, a girl used for his satisfaction. She wanted everything he had to offer. Every stroke deep in to her pussy and the thrill of feeling every nerve ending screaming for satisfaction.

He was ready also as the pain of sex was overtaking him and he needed to make his liquid deposit in her cunt. Tony was now up on his knees with both of his hands holding her butt cheeks. Nothing else mattered now. He was shoving his cock deeper and harder than he had ever done before, hoping he wasn’t causing her pain.

Fuck me baby,” she said, tightening her legs around his thighs, damning anyone who would want her to stop. She was ready again, and she needed fucking, hard fucking. This was not romantic love, this was nasty, deep sex, and violent fucking and she wanted it more than anything. Tomorrow would be time enough to be in love, this was the hottest kind of lust, not heavenly romance but fucking from hell straight into Becky’s cunt.

As she responded to his pumping, her fluids began to splatter and mix with his cum. It was a mess … a wonderful mess, and at least temporarily they were both satisfied … but just temporarily. They sighed and lay back as the sticky dripping fluids made the sheets adhere to their bodies.

To be continued …

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