The Dentist_(0)

The Dentist_(0) The Dentist Two guys are susposed to meet at 4:30. Charley shows up at 4:30 and waits. Finally, at almost 5:00, Paul shows up and Charley says, “Where have you been? You're a 1/2 hour late.” Paul replies, “Sorry, I had to go to the dentist. My dick's been hurting bad.” Charley says, …

3 Viagra Pills

3 Viagra Pills A guy goes to his doctor and says, "Doc, I have a problem." "My girlfriend is sleeping over this Friday, my ex-wife is sleeping over this Saturday and my wife is coming home Sunday." "I need 3 Viagra pills to satisfy them all." The doctor says, "You know 3 Viagra pills 3 …

Condom

Condom Two older women are sitting on a bench waiting for a bus. The first lady takes out a cigarette and starts to smoke. A minute later it begins to rain, so she takes out a condom, cuts off the end, and carefully places it over the cigarette to shield it from the rain. The …

Turner Brown

Turner Brown A little guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this HUGE guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the little guy staring at him, looks down and says, "7 feet tall, 350 pounds, 15 inch penis, 2 lb. left testicle, 2 lb. right testicle, Turner Brown." The small guy …

Shakie Shakie!

Shakie Shakie! An elderly woman moves into a nursing home. Her daughter helps her unpack and get settled in. After a few days, the woman notices a male resident who sits out on the porch every day, all by himself. She decides to go over and talk to him. She asks if she can sit …

The Cannibals

The Cannibals One day 3 guys got stranded on an island, and they were captured by cannibals. They begged for their lives, and the king cannibal said, "Ok I'll give you 2 trials. I'll tell you the first one now and the second one later. The first one is pick 10 fruits of the same …

Stood Up_(0)

Stood Up_(0) A guy walks into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist, "Listen, I have three girls coming over tonight. I've never had three girls at once, and I need something to keep me horny... keep me potent." The pharmacist reaches under the counter, unlocks the bottom drawer and takes out a small cardboard …

Morning After

Morning After It's the morning after the honeymoon, and the wife says, "You know, you're really a lousy lover." The husband replies, "How can you tell after only 30 seconds?"

The Rigid Marine

The Rigid Marine At a party a woman tells a Marine in uniform, "You military guys are so rigid and single minded. You really should lighten up, life is about sex, when did you last have sex?" The Marine replies, "1955." The woman frowns and says, "See what I mean, that's nearly 50 years ago." …